I'm not happy!

every single one of us has been depressed, sad, hurt, hopeless...
whether you are sad over a relationship, the lack of a relationship, no job, not the job you want, no money, huge bills, you're frustrated with your life, your family...

You should not be happy!

This probably sounds weird coming from me...who seems eternally happy...so happy, that some people have accused me of being fake! They couldn't figure out how someone could be happy all the time!
And the truth is, I'm not happy all the time. Happiness is based on some thing or event, that MAKES you FEEL happy. (It makes me happy when someone hugs me or says something nice to me....those are my personal examples....)...but JOY is really what I have. Joy is what's in your heart no matter what is going on around you...
I have been through some less than wonderful things in my life, but I have been joyful during these...I've been able to smile, laugh, and be joyfully "happy" during these times...

Not a lot of people have joy in their hearts...and happiness is too wishy-washy to depend on...
If someone doesn't make us happy, we're sad, if nothing exciting or hopeful happens, we're sad...if someone hurts our feelings, we're sad...but JOY is something that we experience in our hearts...that isn't dependent on outside circumstances...

God has put joy in my heart...and I have to remember to ask him for more joy sometimes. People ask me, "how are you so happy?"....And I am not the type to blast people with "religious talk", I don't consider myself to be "religious", but I do consider myself to have a relationship with God, and to be a follower of Jesus. If you don't agree with me, that's totally fine....if you do, that's awesome...I just wanted the share the reason that I have joy in my life.

Here's one thing that I heard yesterday, that was so great to let sink into my heart.

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus

If you're interested, to start my day off with the right mindset...I read this in the morning...take a look if you want:

http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/EverydayAnswers/dailydevotionals/

have the most joyfully day!!! huge love from my heart to yours, and as my grama used to sign her letters: "JOYFULLY", kandee

Hunting for treasure...

one of my most favorite websites is:
FREDFLARE.COM

they have the most "funderful" (like wonderful, but
more fun!)...ha ha ha ha......things!

here's what I put in my shopping cart:

they also have much needed things like, bacon flavored floss, jewel-shaped ice cube trays, and cardboard antlers...i love it all!

happy online shopping!
that's what I did last night when I wasn't feel very great...
ha ha ha ha....after piles of vitamins an lots of water,
I'm feeling mucho-mucho better!

Thanksgiving!!!

people who ate what I made today:
mom, dad, great gramma, all my little people

best thing I made:
2 layer pumpkin pie cheesecake
with homemade whipped cream
watch below for how to make it
(recipe is at the end of the video)

and best of all, you get to meet my dad in the video....
I am so sorry this is probably not as great of a blogpost as I could've typed...
but I'm kinda ridiculously tired & kinda' don't feel very well....me head hurts...
and me body aches a wee bit....oh vitamin D drops, emergen-c's, and
lots of water.....I'll be as good as new by sunrise! ha ha ha

I'm thankful for all of you who leave me wonderful words of encouragement...and this time last year I didn't have you all to sprinkle your love onto me....I hope I do the same for you!
xoxo and lots of thankfulness, kandee

pumpkin pie and caramel apples!!!

mission:
be the last shopper at the store
for thanksgiving goods!

things I love:
homemade pumpkin pie
with homemade vanilla whipped cream
&
caramel apples with homemade
caramel....oh my goodness!!!!

I'm going to try to convince my mom what an awesome idea
it will be to make a video of her and I making these goodies!!!!!

happy almost thanksgiving!!!

and I'm gonna see if I can talk my sister into video-chatting
(and letting me film it! ha ha ha), of her singing the "fat turkey" song!
ha ha ha ha ha

see you soon!!!!!
xo kandee

missing make-up....

it's been soooooo long since I did a "glameo" (AKA make-up video)..but have no fear...your caped, or rather, lip-glossed, crusader is getting ready to upload to holiday make-up wonder....

I'll post as soon as I do....BUT (and you know how we like big BUTS...ha ha ha)
please watch this video and I think by watching it, it's considered a VOTE...for me!!!
It's on ELLE's videostar page...thanks guys, this was the look that let me win the contest to be in the covergirl ad!!!! yay!!!!!

each time you watch it, it counts as a vote...so watch it 100 times...just kidding! ha ha ha

CLICK HERE TO WATCH IT!!!!! enjoy.....huge love kandee

I invite you....

I am so excited about this art show...it's going to be an amazing experience....not just another art show!

Please come and celebrate with everyone (yes and me!!!).....
Enabled Art Show Debut
December 10th, 2009, from 5-10pm
in Downtown LA at: 610. S. Main St, Los Angeles, CA 90014

for more info and to RSVP, click HERE:

hope to see you there!!! A lot of people are putting a lot of hard work and sleepless nights into this project...



and PS.... I have new videos coming up...a holiday make-up look and a I take you on a special adventure!!!!

sometimes our thinking is more disabled than our bodies

sometimes when we feel discouraged, hopeless, or like giving up....
something comes along, that will change or thoughts and heart....

Oscar Loreto, who's in the picture above...and who filmed and edited the video below, was born without hands and the lower portion of his left leg. He is a hero and inspiration...with so many things, seeming to say, "you can't"...he's made it in the world saying, "I can!"....

We've all felt like the road before us is too hard, and I've made small things seem hugely, impossible, then I listen as Oscar tells me, it can take him up to 15 minutes just to tie his shoe, I realize how small my thinking has been. He's accomplished so much, without even thinking that it would be hard, or "he can't". Oscar is kind, funny, has an captivating personality, and a great laugh...and his story will move you heart into a new level of hope! Thank you Oscar!

I am honored to share with you the inspiration of the , ENABLED PROJECT...a hope filled, collection of images, by Ian Ruhter, with amazing stories that will remind you, "You are ABLE to do anything!"....and that our disabled thoughts are the only limitations that we have.


Click here
and become a fan,
for the official invite to this awesome EVENT.....
Ian Ruhter Photography

I will be there and I hope you will too!

huge love and heaps of hope, kandee

when you feel you can't.....

(This is my new friend, Oscar, skating. But what you may not see in this photo, is that he doesn't have a left foot to put on the board, and he is missing what we take for granted everyday, both of our hands!)
how many times a day do you grab things with your hands a day? Pulling the blankets off you in the morning...brushing your teeth...turning the doorknob in your room....and the list goes on.....

Oscar was born without his hands, and a left foot and lower portion of his leg.....but what he can do with determination in his mind...won't stop him from anything...even if it means some mornings it takes him 15 minutes to tie the laces on his shoe...

I had the most amazing interview with Oscar...his story sets every thought that tells you, "it's too hard or impossible"....free to fly out the door and fills you with the hope that....in this life, there may be obstacles....but NOTHING...., no disability of your body or disability in your thinking, needs to ever stop you from doing what you were created to do!

I did an interview with Oscar (just wait...he's an incredible, inspiring, and sweet human being!), and with my good friend, Ian Ruhter , who has been working on his art & inspiration project, called ENABLED...which shows your heart and mind...the incredible stories of some (what society calls "disabled") of the most enabled and inspiring people.

These people were born with missing limbs, went through horrific accidents, or suffered illnesses that took away their limbs....but they have done more than the average person...without waivering!

Ian is an amazing photographer, that shoots for world famous brands...he has devoted his heart and energy to this project (to bring hope, awareness, and inspiration to a world that's in need of a little "enabling of your dreams"). He has poured his own saving into this, and is ready to show you this amazing story of hope...

Watch tomorrow for the interview....(on youtube)...and the invite to come and have your heart changed beyond belief at the premiere of the art show with me.....

may your hearts and hopes soar to the moon, huge love, kandee

People....

People will forget what you said, forget what you did.... but they will always remember, how you made them FEEL!

Today, and everyday..try to make someone feel special, loved, beautiful, or even amazing. Each day is too precious to let it slip by just living in our own selfish little world.

More people should smile, hold doors open for people, say thank you and please...and tell people to have a "great day!"...

I watched my friend, Jamesa, shake someone's hand...she shook their hand like normal, then clasped her other hand on top of theirs...as if to "hug" their hand. The hand "shakee", you could tell, felt closer to her, instantly!

Everyone could use a hug, a pat on the back, a better handshake...even a wave hello!

Let's be on a mission to make people "feel" better, by just a few, free things we can take the time to do today!

PS....
I am very excited...!!! After I posted a blog about Stephanie Nielson, of (nieniedialogues.com),
I got an email from a wonderful girl named, Kimberly, that said it was mentioned in a prayer, and that she was moved to want to donate to me, her round trip tickets to go meet Stephanie!!! She is going to try to contact her!!! I am so excited...I had goosebumps and my heart was moved to tears as I read her email! I can't wait to hear what happens!!!!
(by the way...the hands in the photo are Stephanie and her husband's, in their special "burn gloves", which they wear daily.)

If any of you know Stephanie, and could offer some help in any way, I'd love it!!!

may your friday be filled with extra sparkles!!!! xoxo kandee

piping hot video....

fresh from the oven....
here's is a lil' video I shot just walking around downtown LA a little bit....
I show ya stuff...
buy us cupcakes.....

and for the leggings......I got them at Forever 21....(the shirt too)
my SUPREME necklace I got at the Renegade Craft Fair in downtown...
or you can go to Dust Designs on etsy.com....search Supreme or (cutlass supreme necklace)...
I don't know if she has anymore.....I can't find mine right now....and it makes me a little sad....not too sad...there are bigger things in life than losing a necklace...ha ha ha ha...no matter how rad it is! ha ha ha

hope you enjoy...now let's go on a walk......come on!

(PS...you can watch it bigger by clicking the lower right hand corner...where the YOUTUBE letters pop up! smiles, kandee)

I'm in a covergirl ad!!!!!

i went to the airport...then I went to get a magazine to calm my "no-likey-the-flying", nerves...
I grabbed the ELLE magazine...
I knew I had won the CoverGirl contest...but I hadn't seen the ad, and i didn't know when it would come out! I was so excited...and my name was printed all HUGE...Kandee!!!

And I'm right next to DREW BARRYMORE, in the magazine!!! I love her! I can't believe I am in a magazine, right next to Drew Barrymore!!! Maybe she'll even look at the page with me on it!!!!
Oh my GOODNESS!!!!!! I am so, EXCITED!!!!!!

I wanted to buy 5 issues, but I didn't because it would've made my purse too heavy (you know how big magazines are!?!)....i think I'm on page 262, or something close like that....I put all the subscription cards that usually fall out on you, as a markers! ha ha ha ha

I am so excited!!!!!! I'm in Elle, magazine!!!! (For December!!!...) yay!!!!!!!!
Okay....I'm going to go back and stare at the page some more, ha ha ha ha, just kidding!
huger than huge love on this sparkly day....
remember to tell someone you love them...and just how beautiful they are.....
kandee

a day in pictures

lunch on Olvera Street...an enchanted little street that makes you feel like you got to Mexico....for some reason I think these Lucha Libre (mexican wrestling masks are awesome) ha ha ha
what i ate: flautas and rice (and chips & salsa ofcourse)


the HUGE factory where American Apparel clothes are made...the sign says LEGALIZE LA....ha ha ha....this place looks like a big spooky prison....i don't like it....but I thought the sign was funny


i drew my name in the sand on the beach in santa monica.....with a love heart....for anyone who needs a little extra love today....
oh sunset!!! I filmed a little bit of the sunset and running around santa monica pier....just need to edit it....like i took you with me!!!! i even went on a scary ride..ha ha ha

me...trying to rest in the dressing rooms at H & M (on the 3rd street Promenade in Santa Monica)..while my friend tried on clothes....
right after I took this picture...a girl that worked there, came up and asked if I was "kandee johnson".....I felt so famous...hee hee hee, she was super nice and said she subscribed to me...and read my blog!!!! yay!!! If you ever see me, please say hi...and I promise I'll give ya a hug! I'm really nice and friendly...
in elevator..taking myself out to dinner
my LA burger....bacon, roquefort cheese (facny) and fries....BEFORE
AFTER...
ha ha ha ha...
that was my day in photos.....
the sun is sparkling down on your heart...enjoy this day...no matter what or who happens!!!
huge love, kandee

troubles and toothless

this is my toothless tribute...
sometimes when I get bored....on a photo shoot...ha ha ha ha
I had my tooth-black-out color...and thought it would be "amusing" to "knock-out" my tooth
so in case you ever wanted to know what I'd look like "sans" a front tooth..tada!!!



more toothless photos...via my self-photography and my iphone

here was the make-up table at the studio....make-up palooza!

part of the studio in downtown LA...it had beautiful windows
and now for the TROUBLES.....
most mornings you wake up...thinking the day will be good....sometimes even great, and by the end of the day, you will have faced something TROUBLESOME, painful, frustrating, troubling, stressful.....
We never know what trouble lies ahead...all I know is that you need to be mentally prepared. We can't let things bother us so much that is destroys the rest of our day. We need to remember that we can't let anyone have the permission to make us feel less-than, or to let a situation steal our joy.
We can take comfort knowing that God will give us double for our trouble! ha ha ha Remember we can give all our cares to God..and he will give us the answers and strength to deal with anything. Troubles are a part of life...we just need to work out our mental muscles and prepare ourselves to be strong and ready to handle things with strength and pass it on to God to do the rest.
I pray that all of you have a wonderful day...and your troubles will be running the other direction!

PS...Hi to Kristel from the H & M store at the 3rd Street Promenade, for recognizing me and saying she reads my blog and is a youtube subscriber!!!! yay!!!!

Imagine I am there, to give you a "mental" hug, to go through whatever you are going through...and say, "you can do it"!....this will pass, and we'll be stronger!!!
huge love, kandee

packing, planes, and patience

things I did yesterday:

1. booked a flight for a job
2. had not really any real time to pack...(we'll see what I end up with for an outfit?!?)
3. had a really good sushi dinner
4. saw that I am in the ELLE magazine (page 262 or something!! so excited!!!!!)..more on that when I can take a pic of it!!!
5. had a semi-grumpy flight-stewardess (that as a boy)...make me check my Zuca bag full of make-up...(I never check that sucker....if all my make-up breaks...no bueno!)...it made it alright thanks to my ZUCA bag!
i love this thing!
the flight was delayed...and it reminded me how little patience, people have...
we want things faster all the time...
we want to have the fastest internet connection...
we want success faster than it takes...
we want relationships at the blink of an eye...
sometimes people give up when their dreams are coming true as fast as they want...
but patience grows by working at it in your heart...
nothing makes it happen faster the more you force it....
EXAMPLE: people try to force their dreams to happen so fast, and when they don't see the results they want...they give up! There is a season to things...just like you can't pick a piece of fruit from a tree when it isn't ripe! You need to be patient and wait. Trust me, there is a reason it all is happening the way it is. You are meant to enjoy and delight yourself on the process...while it's taking place. God knows the path of your future....the best opportunity in the world, might be 2 months away...and you want to give up now, because you can't wait! Wait for the wonder!

You can't speed up a relationship...you'll end up with the wrong person, just because you wanted to hurry it all up!

I have done this. Sometimes it's like driving on a curvy road, you can't see what's coming up ahead....and you're hungry, so you just pick the next McDonald's that you see....but if you would've been a little more patient...another curve ahead, and there was the best, cool restaurant ever!

I moved to LA, tried to get into acting...I was fatter than I am now...I had recently shaved my head...I was a single mom, trying to work in make-up, had a waitressing job in beverly hills...
I got a few auditions...a Simms commercial, and some other offers to host shows...and tinier than tiny parts in some tv shows and movies!
(this was my "headshot" from back then..courtesy of Marc Cartwright)
I wanted it to happen so bad...and fast!
I remember when I had to move back with my parents....I thought my dreams were over, forever! I was very sad and depressed a lot! Especially when I'd see my old LA friends doing really well, moving into the hollywood hills, going to cool places, traveling...blah blah blah...I would feel like such a failure!
But if my heart would've just rested in peaceful, happy patience...knowing that GOd longs to give us the desires of our hearts..and he knows what they are...he put them in us!

If anything....when anger or frustration build up today...whether it's because of traffic or not getting the results you want....breathe in the beauty of knowing that maybe this is saving you from something...or that the best thing is waiting for you patiently....and just enjoy each precious moment until your season is ripe for the picking!
typed with love...kandee
If I only would've know that this was the wrong season...that up ahead I would be standing in an airport and see my picture in an ELLE magazine!!!

shaving my head...oh boy!

this was me....
about 2 months, post-shaving-my-head-at-a-commercial-break...where I saw Erika Badhu with a baldy head...I thought she looked stunning...and very un-britney spears....

at home: I stood and stared at my head....for a long time...and rubbed it....it felt wonderful!

at work: people screamed

at home: "what did you do!?!"...came from everyone's mouth...ha ha ha ha...but that's been a theme in my life...ha ha ha (what did you do to your pants? what did you do to your walls? what did you do to your hair?")

i've been trying to grow it out since then.....many a bad haircuts (not by jerry...by some "nameless" salon in san diego..where I left with yellow hair in an unwanted asymmetrical cut) and accidental scissor-mishaps...

to today...where I take you with...a butterfly on the wall....to get my hair cut by Jerry Park at BARRACUDA salon
7769 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 852-7179
click here for more info at facebook:
BARRACUDA SALON on facebook

click here for more info on myspace:
BARRACUDA SALON ON MYSPACE

Jerry is super sweet and really cool...tell him i said hi!!!

now let's go get my hair cut.....

PS..... thanks to my friend, Ian Ruhter for filming it for me...way better than me doing it myself!

oh you beautiful...

this is Stephanie Nielson...
she is more beautiful than she knows...

I found her story and blog from a visit to etsy.com, she was on the front page
She was cute and had an adorable love of vintagey, colorful things and little precious treasures, and a love of hats...which made me think we would be great friends, if we ever met! She has the most adorable relationship with her husband...and made me dream of finding a wonderful husband someday, that would adore me like he adored her!

I read all her blog posts (http://nieniedialogues.com/)from the beginning..and cried and cried.
She doesn't know how much she has inspired me! (not just starting a blog about my babies, but so much more, you'll have to read her blog to know! I love her!)
she is enchanting, creative, adorable, and a wonderful mama
she also was in a fiery plane crash with her husband,
where she was placed in a comma due to her severe, disfiguring burns, which covered her entire body. For months she was away at a burn center, away from her 4 precious babies that she blogged about daily, their adventures. She was the inspiration for me starting my "adventuresinkandeeland" blog about life with my little people!

she returned to her babies with an entirely different looking face, has to endure daily rituals of scrubbing her delicate flesh, sometimes until it bleeds, takes many medications, has to wear special burn "healing" suits that cover her hands...
and she said she longs to feel "beautiful"....that beauty that makes a girl feel cherished and adored...
that someone thinks she is the most beautiful thing in the world...
God says he will give us beauty for ashes...and when all these hard or difficult things have happened in our lives...he will restore that with beauty in our lives....
NOTE: if you are a guy, and happen to be reading this...please, make a point to tell that special girl in your life, everyday, that she is the most beautiful girl in the world! Every woman was designed to feel beautiful...soft hair, delicate hands, gentle features...and eyes that show you they love you...you'll never know the gift you give their heart by telling them they are beautiful...it's like setting a caged butterfly free...to soar and fly and it makes their heart feel huge!!!

Stephanie (or Nienie), is more beautiful than words or the human eye can explain! Beauty is something more than dolling up to impress people...it is more for your own eyes, than anyone knows. When you feel beautiful, it makes you walk like you are beautiful, it makes your heart feel like it got a huge hug.
And the beauty that Stephanie has, that gorgeous heart, that sparkles out into the world with through her twinkly eyes, and her kind words....and gentle spirit, make her more beautiful than any supermodel on any magazine cover.
I have seen some "beautiful" people...models, actresses...just average people...but when they spoke, or I saw how they treated people...they became uglier faster than you could imagine. Like looking at one of those old cowboy towns, where the front of the building looks all fancy, but tha back just looks all ugly!
And I have seen some people, that, the light from their eyes, and the joy in their heart....makes them look like the most gorgeously, captivating person you've ever seen!

As the wisdom from my son and his friend told me: "girls are like milkshakes....they might look all good with whipped cream and stuff....but then they might taste horrible! A girl might look cute, but then she talks....and has a bad personality and that makes her real ugly!"

I wish I could meet Stephanie Nielson, one day, I wish I could do her make-up, and make her outside feel just a fraction of how amazingly, breath-taking, her "inner" beauty is! She is one of the most beautiful women in the world to me!
May beauty shine from your heart today..and please, please, release compliments from your heart...you never know how it will make someone's day!
typed with love....from your kandee

Jesus lives in LA...

somedays feel like a little bit of sugary-wonder was sprinkled on them... I had one of those days.... I got my haircut at Barracuda Salon(something that has only happened in a salon...a handful of times), and for some reason it makes me feel fancy. (and more hair pictures to come...have no fear...i even have footage for a video!!!yay) I got to eat dinner at El Coyote in Hollywood....and we were given the "fabulous", Manager's table...
which really means...."crappy table by the kitchen doors"
low-riders in the display lobby at El Coyote...where they said in Spanish, "her pants look like MC Hammer"....but what they didn't know, is I can understand what they are saying! Then I wanted to go see if the Christmas decorations were up at The Grove (an outdoor shopping experience, with little cobblestone streets, a water show...and lovely frank sinatra-esque music plays)... and to my wondering eyes....I see Jesus on the street corner......

..."parts" of the Christmas decor was up (Jesus was not part of the decor...even though he would be fitting as a more infantile version...with a manger)
(me and Jesus aka Kevin, apparently he's on TMZ all the time! He was so nice and genteel...and he said he loved me AND he liked my outfit...AND meeting me was on e of his favorite things!) ...the Santa house with candy on it!!!!!!
(they even bring in snow machines...and shoot fake snow from the building tops while you walk around in 60 degree weather...ha ha ha...i love it!)

I got to see the water show...drink a hot peppermint chocolate from Coffee Bean, and a crazy lady tried to tell me she saw good things and asked if she could read my palm....I said no thanks and i didn't have any money...then she got kinda upset and didn's say anything else...go figure!

and what better way to finish off the night than walking by an a field of lights...

these are outside the LACMA (LA county museum of art.....)...ever since I first drove by this, I wanted to go back at night......the light is so beautiful and bright, when you're in the center of it...there aren't even any shadows...oh what a light!!


typed with love....and may you have sugary wonder, sprinkled on your day or night....
love from the sugary one....

the things in life that matter...

(and yes...I had to re-upoad this again..One of the "country" songs got flagged on youtube...so I re-edited it...I like it better this way, anyway! ha ha ha)

Beauty is all around us...and sometimes the most beautiful things, moments...and even people don't get appreciated and celebrated like they should!

I love this: "don't be anxious and troubled about anything about your life, about what you will eat, about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, the body, and clothes."

It is the moments in life...when you feel a flood of joy,happiness, and peace in your heart...like when I saw this huge creamy yellow moon, slowly peeking above the purpley desert...my eyes wanted to slow down time...and my heart felt the beauty...

My life is not anything near perfect....bad things happen...i feel overwhelmed...situations in my life scare me...i cry....i get sad...but one thing I do know is....
them more you dwell on your problems...the more you allow them to rule you and your emotions.
If you have a spiritual life that is filled...peace will dance around your heart, and joy will shine like the rays of the sun into your heart....and it won't make sense to others that don't have it. But you will know that "happy" is something that there because of some circumstance ( i am happy I got a new pair of shoes......that's an example)...joy is when your heart feels happy for no outside reason...it's just there...
If we meditated on spiritual nourishment...instead of meditating on our problems...talking about our problems and letting them rule our thoughts...we would be much better off.

I just had something happen that made me so upset, I was crying, I felt like throwing up...and I had my airbrush class to go to the next day...I could've either thought about the "bad" stuff all day and let it rule and run my day...right into the ground. But instead I thought, "God knows the outcome....I am going to trust in Him, and hand all my worried over to Him", "my problems are going to be there, whether I think about them or not...so I might as well enjoy each little moment...and cast all my cares on God...that's what he's there for....

And when you do this, your heart will be free to enjoy simple pleasures in life...like moonrises and sunsets...seeing a balloon flying through air...smelling beautiful flowers...the list goes on..and on....
today i will look for beauty...and as always...I hope I can film it and share it with you!!!

let's go be beauty hunters....and trouble-forgetters...and in the process, you just might discover the solution to your problem....
typed with love.....kandee

i had so much fun today and yesterday....
why?!? you ask.....
i got to take the airbrush course from Dinair....it was so fun....i want to go back everyday....!
this was from day 1...lots of airbrush exercises...wait til you see what we did today!
I am muy tired...and must sleepo.....
until tomorrow...may you have sparkling dreams and fanciful wishes......
kandee (the tired) ha ha ha ha

uhhhhhhhhh!!!!

All the face in this picture tells me, is: "i don't know about this!?!"....
If I could tell you all the times in my life when I have thought that..."oh no! I don't know about this!?!"...
Like waves crashing on the beach....these kinds of thoughts have crashed into my mind...
how's this going to work?
how am I going to have money to pay rent?
how will this ever work out?
and on and on....

The beauty is...if it were up to me....not a whole lot would happen...if I look at my past...I would be quick to know that....I can't rely on just me...whenever I have taken my eyes off of myself...
and looked to God for my help and guidance...man, doors open up and things take place that I never even imagined!

Sometimes worry...is the worst thing you can do...but you can surrender your cares on someone that cares for you more than you'll ever know!

Remember...
you are more talented than you think, more beautiful than you know, and more loved than you can imagine....kandee


ps. I get to go to make-up airbrush academy today...so excited!!! Can't wait to tell you all about it!!!!! yay!

things I love....

1. these people (see more here)

2. my SUPREME necklace (which I thought I lost yesterday! But I found it!)


...that is from a Cutlass Supreme (car)...(the one above is from a Coupe Deville) that I got at the Renegade Craft Fair in Downtown LA...you can find more like it...I finally hunted the girl down that made these awesome neckalces!!! Her name is Dust Design company CLICK here...

I love my big pink tutu....I got at Polka Dots & Moonbeams in LA....(as Jordan's bus dropped him off yesterday...I was packing my big rig to drive...it was full of pink tutu's, pink suitcases....and he said all the kids on the bus were like, "that's a lot of pink!!!"....ha ha ha ha...you know it!

wait til I post the 80's dress I bought at a yard sale.....AWE-SOME!!!!!